I often get asked which city I like more, now that I split my time between New York City, Harlem to be exact and Miami Beach. It’s a hard question to answer because I love them both for different reasons. Not to long ago I wrote a blog post explaining my reasoning for moving to Miami Beach from Harlem. It was a culmination of things but mostly the pandemic that spurred it. It was a rough time for me, alone in my apartment for several months. I even spent a birthday in lock down. I needed space and fresh air and packing all my things into two suitcases and blindly moving to Miami after securing an apartment in during a New Years Eve trip was a turning point for my life. But let’s get into the real reason you’re here. You want to know the difference between these two amazing cities and I’m here to give you the answers, or at least my opinion on the matter.
ALL ABOUT THE BENJAMINS
I’ll start with where I think most people should start when considering moving to New York or Miami…the money. When I was working as a Doctor of Physical Therapy in Manhattan, it took me about 5 years to reach a salary of 100K from a starting salary of 65K fresh out of graduate school. That was because I hopped around a lot and that enabled me to increase my salary quicker than staying at one place for several years. That’s just a gross income though and most of my money went to rent, student loans and bills. A 100K gross salary does not equate to being rich in New York City. At best you’re considered middle class if you want to break it down that way. Even though I had a high salary, I was still living pay check to pay check. At one of my physical therapy jobs, I only got paid once a month. Can you imagine that stress. If something suddenly came up financially, I was panicked. I learned to live with chronic stress and high anxiety but the trade off was that I was finally making the kind of money I’d only ever dreamt about. I wouldn’t have been able to do that in Miami but the cost of living in Miami is much lower than New York.
Those high earning salaries just aren’t available in Miami unless you’re in very specific and niche professions. I find that people who move to Miami are already established and making the kind of money they desire in their perspective fields and/or they are able to work from home. Now, as far as my fairly new career as a Full Time Content creator, the money is also different between New York and Miami. New York based brands and PR companies know that money talks and are quick to pay for the content they want. Knowing that payment ensures the results they or their clients want to attain. Miami is a different beast. In Miami, it’s more about the look than the check. Some people just want to be seen at certain kinds of prestigious events, instead of being paid to post about said event. It’s been said that many of the content creators in Miami are already affluent, whether it’s family money or a past career, so the money doesn’t matter as much.
Hopefully, you’re picking up what I’m putting down. So it’s definitely been harder for me to get payment from Miami based brands and PR when they are so used to creators doing things for free. Luckily, there was a huge influx of New Yorkers in the content creation sector who also moved to Miami during the pandemic and we all came with the same money matters mindset. Miami mostly caters to lifestyle brands because it’s a travel destination where hotels and restaurants are the main attractions and revenue generators for the city. Whereas New York encompasses everything from beauty, to spirits to fashion. Thankfully, local Miami jobs are a small percentage of my earnings and I still get a fare amount of New York City based jobs being that the majority of my audience is based in the northeast. So if earning a bigger salary is your aim, New York is definitely the place you want to be but you’re going to have to make a trade off for quality of life.
QUALITY OF LIFE
I 100% have a better quality of life in Miami. Miami wins that one hands down. I found that my anxiety is higher in New York. To the point where I felt like I needed to be on medication and one even begged for it. There wasn’t any one particular thing about city life that caused my anxiety but a myriad of the high stress work environment, the fast paced movement of everything from commuting to relationships, the noise and finally the brutal and soulless winters. Although I lived in New York City for over 15 years, I never got used to how depressing the winters were and how long they lasted. Winter seems to go on forever and there wasn’t much to do but be indoors. I’m the kind of girl that thrives in the sun and there’s just something about seeing a palm tree with lush green leaves glittering against a perfect blue sky that just does something to my spirit. The seasonal depression that would attack me every winter in New York was ruthless. I hated that I never got to celebrate my birthday in May in a short dress because it was STILL cold.
The cost of living in New York finds new ways to surprise me every time I’m back for a visit. The price of food is extortionate and why are the taxes so damn high but the trains and the streets are filthy? Rent is high but I can’t control my radiator heat. There’s always someone playing bachata at 7am or a domestic dispute at midnight for the entire neighborhood to hear. I’d gotten really used to the noise in New York City until I became a full-time content creator and was spending more time at home filming YouTube videos. It got so bad that I’d have to wake up at 6am to film because by 10am the neighborhood would be too loud. That’s when I knew, something had to give. I couldn’t find peace. Even now as I’m typing this in my Harlem apartment, there’s a loud banging from some construction and someone is blaring 12 Play by R. Kelly on the radio. Why in 2024 are we still listening to R. Kelly? Contrary to what people may think about Miami Beach, it’s pretty quiet, even during Spring Break. Hell, I don’t even know when Spring Break is because most of that action is in South Beach or South of 5th Street and I’m miles away from that. I thought I’d miss the seasons but I don’t. I can walk to the beach any day of the week in 5 minutes and sit out on my patio watching the sun rise each morning. I can ride my bike for miles on the boardwalk. Miami is reallllly clean too, like realllllly clean. There are people out cleaning as soon as the sun comes up. For there to be no state taxes, I don’t know how they keep it so clean. But I’m here for it. This one goes to Miami where leisure is the lifestyle.
WORK LIFE BALANCE
Like I said, leisure is not a lifestyle, it’s thee lifestyle in Miami. Everything is done a little slower. No one is in a rush to go anywhere or do anything. For it to be a huge customer service town, sometimes that can push a Type A person to madness but it has it’s perks. I learned very quickly that if you’re on time in Miami you’re quite early and things are still being set up. If you are on time in New York City, you’re on time or maybe even a little late! Nothing in Miami ever starts on time and that definitely took some getting used to. I find that my work life balance in Miami is much easier than in New York and I think that simply has to do with geography and weather. It’s always warm in Miami so I can go out with friends any time of year. Family and friends are more apt to visit me for quality bonding time. Work seems to be just as important as leisure in Miami, so I can shut off from work when it’s done and not feel the FOMO that I’d inevitably have when I was in New York. If Miami is leisure, New York is work and there’s nothing wrong with that.
I was busy when I was in New York City trying to make it. I was trying to secure the next level in my profession. If you aren’t moving quick enough in New York City, you are getting left behind. That’s the mentality in this work focused city and for the time I lived here, that motivated me and pushed me to level up in both of my careers. It’s a highly competitive environment here, even if you’re just competing with yourself. As I’ve gotten older, more secure in my occupation and more clear on what’s important to me at this stage in my life, I think I would be able to achieve the kind of work life balance in New York as I have in Miami. It would however, take a lot more work, especially when it comes to nourishing friendships in the colder seasons. Miami comes in with another win for a better work life balance. I mean, there’s an actual beach you can swim in…no way New York was winning this one.
CULTIVATING NEW ADULT FRIENDSHIPS
Speaking of cultivating new friendships, it’s much easier to do in New York. I would have been more apprehensive to move to Miami if I didn’t already have a small network of friends already there. I had also gotten used to telecommunicating with friends & family who’d moved away during the pandemic. So physically being near someone was no longer a requirement for friendship. Most of my friendships are with people who don’t take it personally when you two haven’t spoken in a while. When you finally do speak, you just pick right up right where the you left off. People’s priorities change in life as they grow older and I don’t take it personally when they do but living in a place where people vacation can have it’s disadvantages. Many of the people I meet in Miami are just visiting or there for a short while for work. So I’m happy to have had long time friends and work acquaintances in Miami to lean on. I wouldn’t suggest moving to Miami alone if you don’t know anyone there. It’s much easier to make new friends in New York. Most people who live in New York City, especially those who are from New York…never leave! I find this particularly true amongst people from Brooklyn. You will have a friend for life. Sure they won’t have a drivers license but who needs that when you have the train! There are also a lot more cultural events, social gatherings and opportunities to meet people in New York than there are in Miami, especially if you’re Black. New York, here’s looking at you for more new friends.
FOR THE CULTURE
Now, this one may ruffle some feathers but there’s no place like New York City when it comes to diversity and the sheer range of things to do to celebrate the culture. There’s Juneteenth in Fort Greene Park. There’s first Saturdays at Brooklyn Museum. There’s the West Indian Day parade down the parkway. There’s tons of parties, concerts, rooftop shindigs, BBQs, boat rides and so much more that centers Blackness in New York City. There is a rich Black History and community in New York City across all the boroughs and it’s felt. Have you ever swag and surfed with 200 people Black and Brown people? It’s really something and I know that feeling and comradery doesn’t exist anywhere else in the world like it does in New York City. Of course there is a community in Miami as well but it’s not on the scale of New York City. When I need to be around my people, I simply come back home. When I want to celebrate Blackness, I come back to Harlem. We Black folk, are few and far between, especially in Miami Beach. Most of the Black people I know live on the mainland of Miami proper and further north. So if you’re coming to Miami looking for a very rich Black cultural scene like that of New York City, you’ll be disappointed. Now, Miami does have it’s things, like the weekends at Red Rooster and a huge Caribbean community but it’s hard to find that kind of vibe in Miami on a larger scale. It’s always and forever New York for the culture.
DATING & RELATIONSHIPS
After getting asked which city I like more, New York or Miami, the follow up question is usually how is my dating life in Miami compared to New York. The answer is the same for both…abysmal. Dating in Miami is just as bad as dating in New York. There are a few minor differences though. There’s a slight disadvantage for me in the way that I am not the desired physical preference for a large majority of men in Miami. The gold standard of beauty in Miami seems to be racially ambiguous or Latina with long wavy hair and some form of body augmentation. Now I’m not saying that’s what every man is looking for but that’s what a lot of women in Miami look like thus what a lot of men come to Miami looking for. But I have managed to meet great guys in Miami through friends of friends. Actually most of the guys I’ve dated while living in Miami, actually live in New York or other places. It’s a little harder meeting men in Miami again because it’s more of a vacation place and you meet a lot of people who are just passing through.
I’ve had better luck with men who live in Miami but not Miami proper, they are in the suburbs or outlaying towns. New York is a different kind of hell when it comes to dating and that’s because there are just too many women. The men in New York know that and what one woman won’t do, there’s a woman within a block radius who will. I feel like men in New York are never ready for a relationship or something serious until they have their perfect job, their perfect salary and have sowed their oats all over every borough and are near death, so now they’re ready to settle down so that you can be their caretaker. That was a joke, but it was partly serious. New York is a workers city not a lovers city in my opinion. Again, I’ve met some great guys in New York as well, but the dating pool for women actually looking for committed relationships is tiny. So it’s a lose lose situation either way. My advice would be to go to a bible belt state, find a man and bring him with you if you decide to move to New York or Miami. And that’s that on that.
This is the tale of two cities and what I think about each. I love them both for different reasons and I probably won’t ever be able to decide which city I love the most but for now, I don’t have to choose. I can have them both.
xx
Monroe
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This was awesome Monroe
I appreciated reading your perspective on the two cities. I find myself in a slight conundrum as a single, unmarried woman with life fully open to me as to where I can move to next to live/work. I’d like to think that the world is my oyster (and it is) but after my last move to Atlanta I learned the hard way that it is important to move to a place where you have established connections or there are outlets to create meaningful connections. I had considered relocating to Miami but not having lived there before I was reluctant about moving to a new city without a base of friends/family. This blog touched on all the critical areas to focus on in making that decision and I gained some new and valuable insight on the fabric of Miami (New York) from the vantage point of a professional, brown girl that I would not have been otherwise privy to.
Monroe, I loved reading your The Tales of Two cities .. so informative I truly enjoyed it . Also, I love your writing you should consider writing a book 🙂
Whoa! You nailed in head re: this article, I can relate I moved here in the eighties! What an a weakening… salaries very low, and although I’m “Latin black” and fully bilingual doors weren’t opening. I’m a percent in agreement with the last 3 parts of your article, years later I’m still adjusting” not a laughing matter”
This was a great blog post: entertaining, informative and insightful . I love reading your monthly blogs but this one was superb. I lived in NY 40 years ago and it was disheartening to read that the “man situation” hasn’t changed .
As long as you continue doing you that is all that matters Ms Monroe . Continued success in your future endeavors. You certainly deserve and have earned it.
Btw, I’m doing PT right now to strengthen my knee. Your profession is awesome. It’s amazing how your former colleagues improve the quality of life for others.
Continued Blessings
This was so informative. I grew up in NYC but my parents and I relocated to Dallas, Tx. right before my freshman year in high school. I’m always visiting home in the city and my youngest child is in college in the city.
I am so ready to move back, however not to the city but somewhere upstate. I miss the connections I used to have living in NYC and the multitude of people, places and creative energy that only New York can provide. As a wife and mother, I’ve moved around the US 10 states living in most of them 3.5 years each with the exception of the Pacific Northwest, 14 yrs.
I believe that I can safely say, “There’s No Place Like Home”
Great news letter. Written well
Nice read!!…love your blogs..waiting on the next
This was SO good, and a throughly enjoyable read. I was locked in!
This was a great perspective! Im looking to visiting Miami and NYC in the near future so this is definitely good to know. Would you consider a long distance relationship with someone from another state? Sometimes you never know what things could turn into. But Im happy to know that you’re content in who you are and where you are in life presently. Alot of people don’t understand you should be happy with you alone and someone coming along should be complimentary. I feel adding someone to your life should add more joy, excitement, peace etc. not Deplete those things. I pray continual blessings and love for you ♥️.
Hi Monroe
This was a great newsletter. I feel like about Chicago now relocated to Arizona. I hated the winters but loved the spring through the fall and all the festivals. I keep saying there is nothing like the way black man says hello to you like a Chicago man, even the white men I must say.
So glad you are writing, Ciao for now!
Loved this blog! It was very nice and it’s good to hear your thoughts on both places. I think that most of us black women have a hard time dating anywhere we are because we are not the typical standard of beauty. I’m in Colorado it’s the same here they are either looking for a caregiver, don’t have their life together or your not their type.
Hi Monroe,
Great perspective on your tale of two cities.
Omg, Chicago is like New York to me but cleaner. I can’t stand the winters here, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE the diversity and culture in Chicago. There’s always something to do all year round, especially now that our winters have been mild for two years. Usually, it’s just summer and fall that are great times. As for men, for some reason, I ONLY attract New Yorkers here and a few Chicago men. I’m born and raised in Chicago. It’s only a small percentage here too that settle down, but many aren’t really serious. Unfortunately, many want you to be their mother, but that seems to be the case in most major cities. It’s all about upbringing, of course. Being by the water is DEFINITELY top-tier for calmness. I love that you get the best of both worlds, as Jay Z would say.
Your writing is effortless as is your styling. Feeling like it’s a conversation that flows. I’m a New Yorker having traveled only a few times to Puerto Rico and realizing how much comfort and tranquility the sun and ocean can bring. Continue to enjoy all the little things which really are the big things as one ages. Thank you for sharing your time with us.
I love you writing again. The tale of two cities sounds amazing & you truly are enjoying both!
Monroe you’re a natural born writer. I met the person I’m currently dating in the gift shop of an art gallery when I least expected it. Stay open stay curious. As long as you keep writing, I’ll keep reading.
Ciao, Roberta
Hey Monroe,
Huge fan of your work. Absolutely loved this piece on “The two tales of two cities “ so relatable. The winter months are unbearable here in Toronto for me, as i too experience seasonal depression( Island gyal forever) it’s awful.
I will continue live vicariously through you until IM able to move back home to Jamaica.
Love your vlogs and now that i have discovered your blogs… same!!! Keep ‘em coming. Great job Queen!
I expressed earlier on your community post, that the best of both worlds have the benefits of its advantages, which is a win win, and after reading your extremely detailed, informative, engaging, and comparative analysis, you reaffirmed that, life fulfills all of us, in any given moment, at any particular place or time, depending on your needs, desires, dreams, or means, your joy is discovered. Thank you for sharing your experience, it is so generous. ❤️✨
Thank you for this. I always wanted to know your perspective on both cities. I have vacationed in Miami and just passing through I noticed a lot of what you mentioned. Other than the obvious tourists I noticed a large percentage of other than English speaking people. For that reason alone we spent a lot of our time people watching! Beautiful to visit but Ron Desantis alone I wouldn’t live there. Another conversation for another day. I used to visit New York just to go shopping! Canal street memories galore. My sister and I would do it once or twice a year. We would only eat food from the corner vendors. Gyros and rice. It’s interesting my two fav spots to visits you live in both. No wonder I gravitate toward your energy. And you smart, ambitious, a fashionista, funny , make me proud as a a black woman and all the “tings.” Keep living your life to the fullest and every thing else will fall into place in God’s timing! Smooches!
Monroe
I’m a 64 year old South Carolinian woman and absolutely love your content. I’m so very proud of you and all your accomplishments. I’m impressed with your bravery and transparency in to your life.
I’m living vicariously through you. Keep the content coming. Peace and blessings to you always.
First off this comment had me dying ” I feel like men in New York are never ready for a relationship or something serious until they have their perfect job, their perfect salary and have sowed their oats all over every borough and are near death, ” as a New Yorker this is so sad but true in all its comedy.
I’m more into let me focus on God because when I tried it on my own it was not it! Love your blog!!!
As a senior citizen (77 yo) living in TX, I follow you because you are inspiring, even to me. I’m impressed by your accomplishments and by your seeming fearlessness (although I know there is always some trepidation when making new moves). Continue being yourself. I think that’s the most relatable part about you. You are so real, and that makes you beautiful.
Hello Ms. Monroe,
You are a writing beast! You have so much to offer the world in just how you see things. You have a way of putting it all together ❤️ drawing that true picture, to make me feel that I am going through the scenes with you.
Thanks for your transparency and your gift.
Love,
Hi Monroe,
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. As of Miami native and no longer reside there but you have nailed it.
Hello Monroe
Your writing skills are just amazing! I really enjoy everything you do keep being you. Love and hugs x
Hi Monroe, my name is Linda. I’ve been enjoying your your show on YouTube since the storm hit in Louisiana Laura I lost my home during the store but it’s been rebuilt but my time away I was in an apartment and I didn’t have cable but I was able to get YouTube on the smart TV and I discovered your show it was so good and I think you’re beautiful person and you should be very proud of yourself. I don’t really know you, but I’m proud of you specially, as a strong black woman, so good luck on all your new adventures .
Hi Monroe,
This was such a a good read. I enjoyed every word and I am just happy that you are happy and content with your lifestyle. You are definitely That Girl and for me you are gonna slay whether you are in New York or Miami. As far as the Miami men having a preference, just know you are A Rare Diamond. A Beautiful Black Queen and to me there is nothing better than that. Their Lost!
Love,
Michele ❤️
Nice read!!…love your blogs..waiting on the next
Hey Monroe! Love the vlogs as usual. Haven’t been to NY in years. I would love to visit Miami again. I have never been there when I wasn’t working. I love looking at the photos and mentally plan a trip. This is my favorite time of year–FASHION WEEK!
Monroe, I really love your content and writing style. I often wondered how living in Miami as a black ( non Hispanic) woman would be. I’m in Miami 3 to 4 times a year with my husband on business and I rarely see anyone that looks like me. Anyway, I’m so glad you’re finding your way and thriving in both cities .
I’ve always loved your blog, it’s Great!
Monroe,
You have a very good, relaxed writing style – very engaging. This piece gave a very clear picture of the two city environments for someone in your position in life. I found it extremely interesting. I used to wonder why you left for engagements in Miami when you’d almost be “late” – now I know. I spent a month in New York some years ago but I’d say that, with the influx of so many illegal immigrants burdening the infrastructure, it has changed. It looks as though it has from YouTube videos. I think your material deserves to be published, but maybe you are keeping these blogs as chapters in your own book. If you’d like a friendly editor to just check everything (free of course), I’d be happy to help. I used to edit an international academic journal. My Faculty was Education. I look forward to your next piece, and thanks for this enlightening reflection I thoroughly enjoyed it.
I love this. And I enjoyed watching your move. The pros and cons make perfect sense. And ideally I think I would work/live between two states or shit even two continents to have the best of two worlds. I’m from Oakland, Ca. and it’s a certain culture and weather I miss! But I’ll never miss the prices and insurmountable amount of homelessness. I’m in ATL I love how enterprising folks are here but I don’t feel that “town” energy or down to earth vibe that I can get at home. Ultimately I’d like a home in both places tho. Goals.
I was in Miami last Christmas from holiday and thought of you. I always wonder how non LatAm Americans fare in Miami because it seems almost everyone only speaks Spanish. Or maybe it’s the area I was in? Luckily I studied Spanish in school and also work for a LatAm company so my Spanish is passable but it does get exhausting having to switch between the two every second I guess you’re not in an area where a language barrier is much of an issue. My mom always gets frustrated when we go to Miami cause she doesn’t know any Spanish but I do (she wanted me to learn french growing up haha)… but who wants that switching languages hassle on holiday?
Monroe, I admire you, I never comment on YT but watch all your videos. Your summary on the dating pool and how men only want you when they are “near death” was perfection and hilarious all the same (but it’s true). Keep staying in your lane and winning. Much love from Chicago.
Excellent Writing and point of view
Really enjoying your newsletter so glad I signed up for it. I love all your videos there’re fun and informative.❤️ Tell Maria she’s an excellent photographer.❤️
Monroe, I’m so happy you are back writing. I can tell by the tone of your blog post, that this is one of your passions. I loved the way you broke down the two cities, and I can see exactly what you mean. Living in any of the “businesslike cities” can be exhausting mentally and financially. There is nothing like watching the sunrise at the beach while the world is still sleeping. Until next week!
Hi Monroe, my bestfriend and I are planning a trip to New York in December. This will be my first time in the big apple. Now i know you know all things New York, can you recommend some activities and restaurants that we may enjoy? Aswell as some good hotel options. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that we may run into you.
This was such a great read Monroe and on the money. I have lived here most of my life by way of the Caribbean Island.
I have met a few great men, and have been in a few long term relationships, as I got older and knew exactly what I wanted, the chances of my finding my person became slim.
I have always said that in order to meet a man and have a meaningful relationship, I may need to move to the Midwest but like you I have grown accustom to the beaches and the laid back lifestyle which has made it extremely hard for me to leave.
That being said, I have not seen a single person in the midwest/ or where it is extremely cold while visiting no matter the looks/stature.
I am still holding and hoping that my man is out there somewhere. I am not giving up at all, because I am worth it!
What a good read! I have experienced both cities over the years and I share a lot of your same sentiments. During the pandemic I broke up with my guy and decided to give Miami a go too see if I would make it home. I do love the Caribbean culture but it is so heavily Spanish. The one big deter was the rainy season. I now know that I want to be bicoastal at some point and spend majority of my winters in Miami or somewhere warm with a bit of culture. I can’t wait for that day. You are definitely inspiring and I love the insight you share. May you find fulfillment in love despite not being the obvious choice of desire. A real man that knows beauty will come your way. I hope you get the most you desire out of both cities unless you decide to choose.
Great read Monroe. My only suggestions to meeting new people is to join some kind of group activity ie biking, cooking, book club etc. When I was last in Miami I went to group outdoor yoga sessions which is another opportunity for the regulars to interact.
Monroe, this was a great read! I’m not sure how I missed this article as I’m subscribed to your newsletter but better late than never. I’m suffering in the Chicago winters so I can relate to the New York winters. However there is nothing like summertime Chi! I truly enjoy both Miami & New York for different reasons as well. I’m thinking about working a month of winter in a hot climate starting end of this year or beginning of next year. Keep shining & grinding!
Great read and interesting perspective. I get to live vicariously through your vlogs/blogs in both cities.
Glad I finally read this post. Great read and you definitely hit on some real points, especially me being a native New Yorker. Being just a tourist I always wondered what it would be like to actually live in Miami. I love the bicoastal perspective. Seems like you made the right choice.
Monroe this is a must read if you are moving to New York or Miami. Your writing is amazing!