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I had no intention on writing a post like this until I got an email from one of my younger readers a few days ago. She pointed out that she also has a gap in her two front teeth (Diastema) and that she gets picked on a lot about it but her seeing my blog and that we both shared that gap toothed smile made her feel better about herself. I was also picked on a lot about my gap. Mostly in middle school which were some of the toughest years of my life. I remember crying in the bathroom seeing things on the bathroom stalls that girls had written about me in permanent marker. I usually had a weekly breakdown in the principles office about repainting the stalls every week.
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When I was younger my gap was relatively small. I couldn’t even fit a toothpick in it. But as I got older it widened more and more. I can fit my tongue through it now (sideways of course). I suspect the older I get it will continue to widen. I had never tried to hide it. I smiled all the time. I was never ashamed of it. It was just another part of me but it did hurt to be called bucked teeth for some reason. In high school I did a few pageants and it was at that time that I considered getting my gap closed and getting braces. I went with my mom and dad to an orthodontist and had some xrays of my jaw done and had a consultation. I was told that I have an overbite, my teeth don’t line up, i’m a tongue thruster and they would have to break and reset (wire my jaw shut) for my teeth to be realigned (and touch) and then I’d need braces for 2 years to close my gap. I was horrified. I decided I’d rather live with my gap than go through all of that.
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 It wasn’t until I was in college that I really started to love my gap and not resent it for getting me picked on. For some reason guys really dig it and all the French people that I met love it. Then having a gap became a “thing”. Think Madonna, Michael Strahan, Georgia May Jagger, Vanessa Paradis. People are even going to the dentist and requesting “imperfect” teeth now. (Note: I seriously doubt dental insurance would cover that!) I feel kinda special that I was just naturally born this way. I also love that its a very strong family trait and all the women in my family have one including my mother, aunts and cousins.
I hope when I one day have a daughter that she will come to love her gap too. I think my gap is just perfect!
xx
Monroe

 

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20 Comments

  1. March 6, 2013 / 1:44 am

    Wow !!!! I can so relate to the drama of middle school 🙂 fab post dear

  2. March 6, 2013 / 2:11 am

    Great post… I went through the same thing as well (share similar experiences).. I hated my gap and didn’t smile as much… I learned (as well in college) to love my gap and NOW don’t even have any intentions at all of trying to close it or use anything to make it seems like I don’t have that gap at all.. Great post once again

    Tammy

  3. March 6, 2013 / 2:52 am

    I’m glad you posted this,In my culture guys would go crazy if you have gap teeth,I remember praying I had one to the point where I used to play with threads and needles to get a gap in my teeth.You have a beautiful smile and that gap is part of you.

  4. egc150
    March 6, 2013 / 2:58 am

    Great Post Monroe!! My teeth shifted in my late teens/early twenties so the small gap I had (fit a toothpick/whistle thru) closed. My husband remembers that he liked it at the time. What a positive message of self acceptance. Perhaps your young reader could also check out WhoisSugar on Youtube. She is a lovely vlogger who also has a gap that I believe is a family trait as well.

  5. monie love
    March 6, 2013 / 6:02 am

    this is a great post! I had a small gap when i was a child and i loved it! Eventually, however, it closed on its own. I think chicks with gaps r super cool! Your gap is apart of you and your smile is beautiful.

    Danny from ANTM has a gap too!

  6. March 6, 2013 / 7:26 am

    I’ve never thought twice about your gap when i saw it. Personally I love it, I don’t know since being teased growing up i often see what society sees and imperfection as beautiful. I see the beauty in my moms tiny almond shaped eyes while people have called them beady and she was teased too. I love this post, because it’s candid, and I will always keep coming back because I love a blogger who isn’t afraid to be this honest about things like this. You keep smiling girl! It’s crazy how in one culture they love it, and others people feel the need to be threatened by it that they result to nasty behavior towards a person especially for something they were born with.

    I’d glad you didn’t have to go through all the trouble just to have your teeth straightened, your gap makes you “you” and that just seems plain on painful just to have straight teeth.

  7. March 6, 2013 / 8:06 am

    I’m French and I LOOOOVE our gap!But it wasn’t something I really cared about before I met my ex-boyfriend…But it is sooo sexyyyy!
    So cute u did a post about that, your young reader will feel secure now!!you’re such an inspiration!
    <3 Take care…and keep smiling!

  8. March 6, 2013 / 8:29 am

    I noticed your gap first time I ever saw your picture and it is one of the strikingly beautiful features about you! I always love that you smile a lot. You are gorgeous! xx

  9. March 6, 2013 / 12:33 pm

    As far as I’m concerned, people with gap are beautiful. There’s just something so unique about it. My sister has a gap as well, and she wears it proudly. I’ve come across a lot of people with gap, and never thought they were once teased about it 🙁

    In my culture, there are certain men who prefer women with gaps. Isn’t that cool?!

    I guess what everyone finds beautiful is different. You are beautiful, even with the gap. It actually adds more to your beauty! Your smile is gorgeous too! Show off your gap…proudly!

  10. March 6, 2013 / 1:26 pm

    It’s amazing how the things we are picked on the most for growing up become the things we love the most! I was picked on so much growing up for being dark skinned, and now it’s one of my favorite traits.

    Your gap is perfect!! The pictures where you smile are always my favorite. I love that blogging allows people to inspire and encourage others without even knowing it. Maybe if there’d been blogs with beautiful dark skinned women when I was growing up, I wouldn’t have hated my skin for so long.

    Thanks for sharing Monroe!!

  11. March 6, 2013 / 1:37 pm

    wow I love your attitude! very inspiring…but it’s s horrible to think how awful some girls can be during middle school! 😮

  12. March 6, 2013 / 3:12 pm

    I love this post girl. Believe it or not I had a gap too but without even telling us, my orthodontist closed it when I had braces!!! My mom still has her beautiful gap!

    Jen
    http://www.commecoco.com

  13. March 7, 2013 / 9:38 pm

    Nice inspiring post. It’s nice to embrace what others considered to be an imperfection.

  14. Anonymous
    March 9, 2013 / 12:55 am

    I have a gap and I love it. I’ve never had an issue with it even when others have tried to make fun of it. I’ve thought about closing it, but I can’t picture my face with it. I get mostly positive comments about it, so why fix what aint’ broken. Cheers to you my fellow gap-toothed sista!

  15. Anonymous
    March 18, 2013 / 4:19 pm

    i admire your honesty – this post was very refreshing-well done

  16. Anonymous
    March 22, 2013 / 3:00 am

    I love my gap now too! I had braces and it opened right back up! I’m perfectly fine with it! I feel special : ]

  17. Regina
    June 19, 2014 / 7:15 am

    I am really happy that you feel comfortable with your gap because i have a gap too and i am not comfortable with it as it hard for me to smile as i sometimes feel embarrassed about it. i am thinking of getting a braces soon. your story have really inspire me.

  18. a.williams
    July 17, 2016 / 7:18 pm

    Well im happy there is people in this world who can understand but im a 32 year old women with a gap and ive always felt ashame of it until this day i still have issues dealing with it i hate the way people stare at me

    • monroesteele
      Author
      July 20, 2016 / 1:20 pm

      If you’re that unhappy with it, do something about it. Pity doesn’t get anyone anywhere.

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